I have contemplated life more this year than I EVER remember. Just stopping to take in the mountain view or to THINK about what is actually going on around me. I don't know if we do that enough.
This summer, I was challenged in more ways than I can adequately describe in words. ALL of my dreams, hopes and wishes were challenged. I examined my heart in ways that I never thought was possible. I asked myself HARD questions, and I made some BIG mistakes with my attitude and the way I perceived my circumstances.
As fall approaches, I am coming to my 4 year anniversary with Crossover, and Crossover is celebrating it's 10th Birthday. I am standing on the brink of our "New" year in ministry and I ponder the depth of God's promises and the shallowness of my belief.
I am inspired by friends of mine who are living a portion of my dream by pursuing adoption of a Chinese orphan.
http://www.nogreaterjoydad.com/2011/08/testimony-matt-peterson-in-china-says.html
I am curious about God's timing and the fact that His biggest promise to me still lays unfulfilled in my heart after 14 years of waiting. (That's longer than Joseph waited....just sayin'! ) Haha!
I am dust. I am reduced to a pile of dirt in the hand of my Father God. My hope is exasperated. My needs seem ignored. My hurts are unrecognized or scoffed at. Yet.....HE remains STEADFAST.
One of the girls on my tour sent me this quote. I feel that it describes our lives so beautifully.
"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These people have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen." — Elizabeth Kubler Ross
My heart aches for the Tree of Life as described in Proverbs 13:12. May it not tarry as it has in the past. For HIS Glory and HIS renown.
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